Panic Attack

I had been feeling so much better since I finished chemo. I had some energy and a little bounce in my step. That is, until I got the stomach flu Monday morning. That wiped me out. Richard got it last night and Katie is starting to feel sick. I hope Tommy can be spared. Today I went for my Radiation Mapping appointment to prepare a customized treatment plan. They used a CT scan to find the target for radiation. The trick was that I had to hold my breath. I have been through some pretty difficult tests and procedures these past...

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I'm Getting Deported!

When I look at this photo I realize just how far I've come in 18 days. This was my method of taking a stroll at the mall on May 4th, after my last chemo and first surgery. After the second surgery I had to take some time to focus on recovering. I'm following a yoga dvd for breast cancer survivors. I'm taking longer walks. I'm meditating often. And I started reading a new book, "After Cancer Treatment: Heal Faster, Better, Stronger", by Julie Silver, MD. I went back to work Monday and people tell me I look great and my face is...

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Howdy

Monday, the beginning of a new week.  How have you been?  I haven't had much to report under the "cancer" umbrella.  I have an appointment with a plastic surgeon to discuss reconstructive surgery. Don't know if it will happen yet, but I thought I would check it out.  I am doing better in my diet....trying to exercise more, dealing with the bone/joint pain.Matthew has finished the bulk of his classes.  One more during the summer and he will graduate in the Fall.  Now, he is job searching.  Such a job...

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Team Work

Image by AnonymousArtofRevolution I've heard that anesthesia can cause post-surgery blues. Evidently it's a problem when you cry for 3 days straight. I couldn't figure out what was going on.  But, as luck would have it, Doc Esther  wanted to see me and asked why I was feeling so sad. I was having some pain after the second surgery I was grieving with students over the loss of 2 babies I was not sleeping  Not eating Not moving Not meditating She wondered if I was going to hurt myself. "Hell No! That's...

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Ranting and Raving

I have been upset all day. It started at the hospital yesterday with my second surgery in eleven days. After I changed into the gown, I put my clothes, shoes and head scarf in a plastic bag. An aid stopped by to take it to a locker. My head felt naked so I asked him if I could have a blue cap and he said, "Yes sir. I'll get that for you right away." Sir? SIR! Are you kidding me? Without hair, makeup, or eyebrows, I look like a man? I am losing myself through all of this crap. I knew this would happen. Then I had a discussion with...

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Do-Over

My broken boob has been on the mend for 10 days now. Most of the pain is under my arm however I think all that will change tomorrow when I go back in for more surgery. When you reopen an excision it causes a bit more pain according to my surgeon. The pathology report showed that the margins were not clear in the upper portion of the tumor so my surgeon will go back in to remove more stuffing. She said the other option would be a mastectomy but she recommended we try this first. I am confident in her ability to get the rest of it tomorrow....

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Looking Forward

When all this cancer stuff began, blogging became good therapy for me.  To tell you the truth, it really helped keep dates and events organized.  Chemo brain still haunts me.  So, when I thought about the name of this blog, living in the moment was exactly what I was doing.  I had to learn from step 1 terminology and everything else a person has to comprehend when hearing those words "you have cancer".  Since I didn't have a crystal ball and I didn't know from day to day what was going to happen...perfect...

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